Thursday, December 31

Thoughts towards the fag end of the year

Taking Stock

Here I am, on the brink of 2008, trying to reflect on my progress over the last 12 months: It has been good year in general for me personally; and except for some disturbing incidents here and there, it has not been terribly bad for us all. It was productive creatively, though if I had more time on my hand and the will to push myself to get more results, I could have done better. But what I could do given my drawbacks, it was not bad. All this is said, of course, in comparison to earlier year or two, which were less productive creatively. Two plays were produced this year: Hamlet and The King Stag; a certain definition was found to my painting activity, I managed to make contacts with several of my friends who I had lost contact with over all these years. That has been satisfying. In July I visited the place of my birth, met surviving members of family-that again has given me focus-and that has cleared certain long nursed conflicts within. On the home front my spouse has been the ever wonderful woman that she is, very understanding and supportive. (Towards the fag end of this year though, we did have some issues, but one hopes that this too will pass and things will be mended). My son, Mir has grown by yet another year ! He has been a source of wonder, the fundamental reason why I feel this satisfaction on a deeper, a more immediate level, although I admit that on that level reason is hardly necessary. January 2007, from the day Mr & Mrs Thomas Chase came calling, things have looked up. Considering that a bumpkin like me should deserve much less, all in all, powers that govern our lives have been benevolent , kind and generous this year. In deep gratitude then, I turn from this little time spent in reflecting on the year just gone by and look towards the future - Welcome 2009!

That is how I ended last year ....
Less than 4 hours to go for the year 2009 to end. What are my thoughts?
To begin with, I have the best wishes for mother earth and all beings which live upon her. May the coming days usher in harmony among communities, casts, creeds, & religions; among men: between man and man; man and woman. May all children have the secure feeling that they are in the safest environment. May the planet thrive. May there be good rains and crop. Let there be spendour, the most natural right of the blue planet.
Then...
This year has been rather hectic. I have had issues with people and with myself. There was some gain, but I wish it were without all that I had to go through and put people through. Let all that be washed.
These are, fundamentally, my thoughts as the year sleeps into a new dawn.

Between these two thoughts - that which has been and what will come to pass, I am! 

Welcome 2010!

Sunday, December 27

Marathi: Vinda Karandikar



चुकली दिशा तरीही हुकले न श्रेय सारे;
वेड्या मुशाफिराला सामील सर्व तारे.
मी चाललो असंड चालायचे म्हणून;
धुंदीत या गतीच्या सारेच पंथ प्यारे.
डरतात वाद्काना जे दास त्या धुवाचे;
हे शीड तोडले की अनुकूल सर्व वारे!
मग्रूर प्रार्थनाचां मी फाडला नकाशा;
विझले तिथेच सारे ते मागचे इशारे.
चुकली दिशा तरीही आकाश एक आहे,
हें जाणतो तयाला वाढेल तेथ न्यारे.
आशा तशी निराशा, हें श्रेय सावधांचे;

बेसावधास कैसे डसणार हें निखारे.

Saturday, December 26

Lines on race

'God given talent' simply means that your particular finish line is an inch farther than the rest. Running time for all is the same. THAT is God's grace!

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Running is not so important as your preparedness to run is...

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"she knows that life is a runnin' race, it's like the merry - go - round" - BGs

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Don't run for life; TURN for it!

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Avoid tripping the man in the next lane, you will finish well

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A coward does not run to fight another day. He does not run...

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Race my heart, with love till you stop, in bliss!

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My father ran a generation before me

on the same track

the same perennial race

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When there is nowhere to reach, the race is over

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To reach out is to race. Race is just another name for fellowship

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To race you need heart, not legs.

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To race you need courage, not just a muscle called heart.

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If you have courage, you are in the race without choice

Thursday, December 24

Misunderstanding art

What do I get on Xmas eve? Flu and negative response to my not-ill-intended caricature postings on Auroville.org.in. So be it!

Flu is alright; I can handle it. Negative response? That too, I can handle. But misunderstandings I can not. Intend something purely for joy in these woe begone times, and the perverse human masses misrepresent you, because they have a right it seems. But it is seldom unanimous condemnation. The confounded response is always mixed, - like it is to any good drama - a bit yes and a bit no. That's where the bug is.

Quite innocently I posted a caricature of a man known to me, who is in charge of paving roads. I have pictured him in his florescent green shirt and beige shorts, standing under a tree with an arrow shaped sign board which reads, "Road to Nowhere". It is supposed to be a mild dig at the controversy these road pavings have caused within the community due to various reasons. That's all there is to it! The said arrow is held in his right hand and it points forward, clearly indicating that the road ahead goes nowhere. So far so good?


But someone - a woman - decides to see my picture through Freudian goggles. Through them you see a simple arrow as Phallus, right? So my poor, harmless arrow undergoes an interpretation. Her comment underscores it; it reads, "...sign board location..."

I see no harm so I reply to it, not seeing what is coming because of it. " B'low the belt", reads my reply, suggesting a bit tongue in cheek, I admit, that her comment was a punch below the belt.

Then there is a row. Most people think that the picture is 'in bad taste'. I fail to understand why the picture is in bad taste when really, it is the comment that is rather lewd. It is the interpretation of a just picture through Freudian goggles which renders it bad. How do I defend myself except by pleading to these people to believe me. That there was no malice originally in the picture. The mess began after someone decided to "interpret"...

This, I think is the fallacy of art criticism today, that a perfectly pleasant landscape is saught to be seen as the artists need for frolloicking in open fields or whatever with a malicious intent.

Monday, December 14

Pinter's CARETAKER in Auroville

Harold Pinter's 'The Caretaker' since its first performance in London in 1960 has received much deserving critical praise. Analysts of theater have dissected the play ever since and so many things have been written about its psychology. Much that has been written is true and yet, one feels, that something more could still be said about this play. Such is this play that it hits you on many different levels. In terms of precise definitions it is a works of art that seems just a shade out of reach.
Critics have compared The Caretaker with  Becket's Waiting for Godot. To me The Caretaker is so much straightforward, for the people in The Caretaker are real people in real situations. But both are great modern plays and the comparison is justified.
I wonder what The caretaker is primarily about? Indeed, it provokes thought. It grips you in a way that the questions arising in your mind relentlessly demand answers. The Caretaker is about manipulation. Yes, it is, but it is also about affection somehow. Is it not also about intensely controlled violence? Yes, as it may well be about forgiveness, too. And it is about man's need to associate and adjust to situations and get out of them. At least to me it was a play primarily about man's need to get out of situations.
Life as we live it is a segmental flux of situations: a ceaseless segmented continuity. One situation changes to another and the two are attached to one another by a shift in the power equation between people who are in them. It is an ocean where people with strangely uncommon characters and needs feel compelled to associate with one another, adjust to one another, in order to anchor & establish a personal identity. From this angle The Caretaker is Pinter's brilliant comment on man, the animal. The claws man uses are different from those used by animals to survive. Pinter shows us glimpses of them, particularly in the behaviour of Mick, the brother of retarded Aston. They are retractable claws, for their dangerous appearance depends on the threat posed by  even an impossibly incapable bum of a character like Davies, the tramp. In the beginning this dubious impostor (with two names, who claims to have been almost everywhere, done everything but in actuality has nowhere to go, and has apparently done nothing in life) is meek and undemanding. But we see that he becomes demanding once there is a shift in circumstance. He threatens to kill Aston, but has no courage to do so because, perhaps, he can not afford the responsibility in every sense of the term.
There is one sequence in the play which, I thought, was a brilliant use by Pinter of pure theatricality to suggest the power equation between the two brothers :- Aston brings home a bag for Jenkins (Davies). It is assumed that it is Jenkin's although he has no clue regarding its contents. Mick grabs it from Jenkin's hands when Aston gives it to Jenkins and hands it back to Aston. This action is repeated about four times. Lastly, Aston takes the bag from Mick and gives it back to him. Only then does Mick let Jenkins have it. A sequence without words packed with meaning! Just the eye contact between the two brothers speaks volumes about the power factor in their relationship.
The caretaker was performed in Auroville on the 11th,12th and the13th of Dec. Norman Bowler, a 75 years old theatre veteran in his maiden directorial venture did an excellent job of it. Whatever may be the other merits of the director, Norman had successfully 'communicated' to his actors what in his view each character was in relation to the complexity of the play. Each actor brought out the maximum that could possibly be extracted from each character. Otto, with quite some years of acting behind him was, perhaps, at his best as Jenkins. His devious Jenkins was obnoxious and ungrateful, mean and helpless and almost every other thing Jenkins is supposed to be in The Caretaker. In degrees he evoked pity and in degrees loathing towards his character from the audience. In 'acting between his lines' he was excellent.
Talking about acting out the unspoken thoughts of a character Krishna McKenzie, playing the retarded Aston was unparalleled. Aston is someone who thinks slow, rather deliberate thoughts and articulates them in a laboured, measured sort of speech. Krishna was superb with his grip on Aston, particularly in his soliloquy towards the middle of the two hour play. There was a masterly handling of lighting by Jean Legrand and Mahi, especially here, as it gradually concentrated just on Aston's eyes; his speech was heard almost as a confirmation of his slow, deliberate thoughts. It was indeed very impressive!
Nikolai Musgrave who played Mick in my opinion had the most difficult job of the three actors, in that he had to balance two delicate aspects of Mick's temperament simultaneously. He is the only man who has to maintain his sanity among two virtually insane characters and equally insane situations in that room, for unlike the other two lost in their own psychosis, he is a member of 'the sane society' outside that room. Nikolai did brilliantly (except where he appeared to smother his smile in a scene or two which were meant to evoke not humour but mordant pathos.)
The set, designed originally by Aubert Defoy, worked wonders with the effect of claustrophobia the play suggests. The dull greenish gray of the walls with all the clitter-clatter strewn about added just that oppressive element which is needed to underscore the uneasy feeling which makes you want to get out of that room. When your sets work as a metaphore for the play's superobjective, I say, "Hat's off, Guys!"

Friday, December 11

Blade of grass and bleeding soles

Now a days I find it difficult to decide anything at all. Well, almost anything at least. I am stuck, sort of, unable to muster courage to move.
I would like to move. But would I?
Even this thing that I am typing has no real ardour in it. Yet I am pushing myself to write. Why? I do not know.
I guess that things get done by pushing, pushing. Without the practice the exercise is new to me. I have depended too much on inspiration, waiting for the big wave to surf me on the breakers as it were. What needs doing is, perhaps, swim across the ocean rim leaving the frothy shallows behind.
This seeking after absolutes, probing deeper into the mystery of union is a tiring business. Somewhere half way my will  has abandoned me.
We allow lofty thought to impress us. I suppose we all do. Certainly the loftiness of human thought inspires many of us to commit; some stick, others escape... I don't even know the truth behind these conjectures! They are there to keep me afloat, prod me on to stick on a while longer yet. And what the hell is this TRUTH anyways?
Simplicity must be the most natural thing but it is the one thing I find most difficult. Am I naturally complicated? But that's bad. To be complicated is bad.
Take this instance: I have this invitation from a school to be the Santa on the 18th. This morning when I read the mail, I typed a reply. And then I tinkered with my spontaneous response, trying to improve it, make it slightly impressive. But on reading what I wrote I found it to be simply not my answer. It did not represent me, so I deleted it and wrote another equally not-mine reply. I wanted to say 'Yes' and thank Priya who sent it. I have not replied to her but pushed the replying for later.
Drastic & calamitous occurrences push me to act - like just now the current is off - which prompts me to post this ....
I will be embarrassed later, but what the hell? Right?